Shifting

I’m sitting here trying to compile a few thoughts and I find they keep shifting. Hmmm, that’s a clear representation of my life at the moment. Ironically, I now live in earthquake territory so maybe my sub conscience is trying to adapt?

Perhaps, this is in part to blame for my lack of blogging lately. I keep thinking I’ll be able to get a few thoughts in order and then get back into the swing of posting more of them, but they remain ever elusive. In hindsight, some of the best posts come when I’m just able to spit (well type) it all out as it’s hitting me. But lately, I’ve had less time to ramble with my keyboard when my mind is racing.

My daily schedule has shifted in the past month. Between plans and efforts to get our ducks lined up to move back home to be closer to family and enjoy better schooling for my children, I’ve thrown in some homeschooling of my 13 year old. All the projects I’ve been doing in my mind (yes most haven’t yet formed into the tangible, physical sort yet), have been put back on hold. On the upside, other benefits have been present. Like helping my daughter with her memoir book of our recent family trip, not only did she stretch some academic muscles we also have now a nice completed book of pictures and journaling. That makes one project started and completed!
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Speaking of projects, I find myself daydreaming about them a lot. In fact, I’ve become quite adept at creating things in my head. For example, my blog is updated with all my file sharing neatly organized. Additionally, the boxes of paper and photos waiting to be digitized are empty and recycled with the contents neatly organized on my portable hard drive. For that matter, all my computer files are neatly organized and updated. I’ve mastered the art of making sushi rolls and pastries. My body reflects hours of careful toning and exercising, my mind filled with hours of educational reading. See how fun it is?! Now, if I could just figure out how to transfer all those wonderful thoughts into physical actions.

It’s hard not to feel distracted when another big change is looming on the horizon. I laugh at myself remembering the thoughts I had a few years ago when everything was going so smoothly and I wondered what might be coming. If I’d only known! It’s funny how comfortable you can get busying yourself with daily grind efforts and how things that are taking all of your precious time and resources can be so quickly redefined. This is all good, the new definitions and directions are both freeing and educational in nature. Now if I could just get everything to sit still for a moment.

In a matter of eight weeks life will shift again. I’ll be in Idaho taking all the next steps toward securing new stability for my family. It will be an event that factors in extended family on both sides which brings more facets into play than one mind can rightly think about without exploding. So I attempt to push it all aside, telling myself that things will be easier when I can be doing things instead of thinking only. I shift. Again.

Perhaps it’s not so bad, this shifting. Perhaps the shifting is what enables me to maintain my balance? Yes, this is a good way to view things. Embrace the shifting.

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3 comments on “Shifting

  1. You’re shifting, I’m drowning. And I’m not even moving to another state again. It’s a real struggle for me to figure out how to earn enough to pay all the pays while also trying to spend some quality time with the kids.

    I feel for you! The only thing harder than trying to maintain balance is doing so while meeting all the basic and most necessary needs! Happy thoughts of success your way!

  2. I think we were separated at birth!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Haven’t I mentioned this before over the years??? I so get what you are going through both as a retired military wife but also as someone whose recent family dynamics have shifted (thank you so much for your supportive comment!!). I just recently learned that it is important to continue to stay grounded while the shifts occur…and prioritizing what is important…time with family over time with laundry (no brainer right?). Anyway, recently went out an bought me a small sign that reads: Life isn’t about waiting for the storm to pass…it’s about learning to dance in the rain….praying for some sturdy dancing shoes for you and me 😉

    Sturdy dancing shoes…I like that! :)

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